As a single woman in the wedding industry, I’m surrounded by couples in love and have the privilege of capturing their love stories. This dream job has also been a hardship I’ve struggled through, watching each couple have exactly what I want. If you’re single in the wedding industry, this episode is for you, because while jealousy can creep in, I want you to shift your mindset. Rather than asking “Why not me?,” change that phrase to “Look at her.”
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“You have not been forgotten or overlooked. You’re not falling behind. You’re exactly where you’re supposed to be today, and this chapter is not a mistake.” – Kaetlyn Bouchillon
Emotions as a Single Woman in the Wedding Industry (1:18)
From “Why Not Me” to “Look at Her” (3:30)
Everything is Temporary if You Want (5:06)
Thank You to My QM Couples (5:28)
Review the Transcript:
You have not been forgotten or overlooked. You’re not falling behind. You’re exactly where you’re supposed to be today. And this chapter is not a mistake. As a wedding photographer, I’ve been capturing the happiest, most joyful days of my couples lives. And I couldn’t help but wonder, why them? How did they find each other? Why are they so lucky? Now this isn’t a conversation to share my worries, or a cry for help to boost my dating life. My mission for this episode is to share the reality of a hopeless romantic in the wedding industry. And to remind all of us that life rolls out in chapters, and you’re exactly where you’re supposed to be. Welcome to Kiana Marie weekly, a podcast for creatives who love to celebrate wins, big or small, by dancing in the kitchen photographers who are excited to serve their clients and friends who are ready to chase really, really big dreams. You can find all the resources mentioned in this episode, Kiana murray.com slash podcast. Join me as I share weekly motivation and chat about growing things, finding genuine connection and celebrating your wins through the lens of a photographer at heart. Come join me for a dance party. Ready?
Oh, let’s go. When I first started this business, I knew what I was getting into busy schedules, working weekends often and turning my nine to five into a 24 seven. However, I knew that sharing these milestones and crashing wedding days would bring me the most joy. It’s my passion. I love creating memories even more than I love simply capturing them. I built this business to be a mom to have the flexibility of creating my own schedule, working as little or as much as my family needed. And to make those long hours feel rewarded with happy tears and appreciation from my couples. As an integrative two wing three, I find myself pushing and trying to control as much of my life as possible, already planning to retire my future husband, but I haven’t even met yet. And to have a flexible work week to be the best mama I can be. But here’s the thing. I’m still single. So the message for this conversation is to remind us that we can plan and dream as much as we want.
But there are some things we need to live up to fate. Just like my soul sister Felicia reminds me often, we always need to leave room for magic. Now I’m being completely honest here. And the first couple years of my business, I felt gypped I envied my couples, they were late nights I would find myself crying through drive thru on the way home from a wedding frustrated, confused, just feeling left out and jealous. To the core. I was excited for my couples and love celebrating their vows. But I couldn’t help but think why not me? When is it my turn? Not for the Pinterest wedding, although those are dreaming, but for the genuine connection and relationship I crave. Flash forward to today I’ve shot over 200 weddings, started sharing more of my life online and truly feel comfortable in my own skin. As I’ve continued to share my values, dreams and corks on social media. I’ve been a magnet for genuine, fun, kind hearted and incredible couples. One of my recent brides Ashley knocked me over the head with a realization. We share similar values, love our country music and share a passion for family traditions. As I was way up in the choir loft and photographing her big Catholic wedding, I shed a couple tears. This time the tears were drops of joy. As Ashley and Alex giggled through their traditional Portuguese and Italian wedding. I felt a rush of love, acceptance and grace. My thoughts shifted from why not me to look at her with her Cathedral veil, interpret lace dress dream and talking dream yellow Sapphire wedding ring, and so much love and light being within her as she exchanged vows with her hunky firefighter husband. I could feel it. I knew then that patience was my lesson. Yes, my turn will come and I’ll be ready when the time is right. Until then, what a gift to share my weekend with couples. I was exactly where I was supposed to be. It’s taken some time, but I can honestly say today I’m grateful. I see it surrounded by so much love growth and opportunity. If I would have met my person years ago, I knew I wouldn’t be where I am today.
I may not have ever moved to Arizona. Could you imagine if we hadn’t even met yet because of one decision in life has a funny way of working out in our favor. It may not be exactly how he imagined it may be even better. The friendships and deep connections I’ve made in the last couple of years and the relationship strengthened with my family has been priceless. I hope you know that you’re exactly where you’re supposed to be. And if you’re not where you want to be. It just means you’re on your way. Keep selfishly loving yourself and make choices that bring you joy Marie Kondo the crap out of your life, eat well workout Because it feels good. Drink more water, invest in your business and crush your limiting beliefs. Yes, this is a message about love, but it relates to all aspects of your life. If you’re feeling stuck with your current job, wishing to travel more drowning with all your responsibilities or just feel the weight of the world, just know everything is temporary. Even the best feelings are fleeting. So make a plan, chase the dream and money will always follow. This is a shout out to all of my Kiana Murray couples. Thank you. Thank you for loving your spouse sharing your memories with me and making this world a brighter place. When I see my couples as wedding guests, steal cuddles with their babies at many sessions and see their thank you cards and Christmas cards on my fridge. That brings me the most joy. Y’all give me so much hope and believe it is possible to have it all,
just not all at once. That’s a wrap on another episode of Quianna Marie weekly. Thank you so much for your listenership and support. You can find the resources and Show Notes for this episode and more at Kiana murray.com slash podcast. I’d be honored and so grateful if you showed your support by leaving a review and writing on your favorite podcast app. Until next time, keep on dancing